Soup is Good for the Soul

 

"Only the pure of heart can make a good soup" - Ludwig van Beethoven

We all know that when we're not feeling well, there's nothing for us but some good soup. Well, Mom has been craving soup lately. Two of her favourite guys came through for her.

Sean making a hearty French Canadian pea soup

Ted making a delicious turkey and cabbage concoction

Mom's freezer is now stocked with individual servings of both soups so that she can easily heat up a healthy, hearty meal.

It should be noted that Mom took both these photos with her new iPad! She has embraced technology and is texting like a madwoman, polishing off ebooks and filling up her camera roll. One of Mom's closest friends told her that, at times, the iPad can make one feel closer than a phone call - photos are easily shared and you can go back and reread emails and other messages to feel the positive sentiments and well wishes all over again. Mom seems to have taken that to heart.

Mom has picked up a couple great recipe books from Cancer Care, but she has requested that you send along any yummy soup recipes that you have. You can post recipes in the comment section of this blog and share with everyone, or you can email recipes to beatthisthing@gmail.com. Or, if you're feeling extra generous, care packages are always appreciated :)

We've decided to keep New Year's a rather intimate affair this year, as Mom is just too tired to have a great big group or to feel like she has to be a hostess. We'll keep it simple, and enjoy lounging in our pajamas eating treats and listening to music. Farewell, 2012 and hello, 2013 - the year of wellness.

The photo album has been added to the blog. If you look on the right-hand menu, below Mom's bio, there is a slideshow. You probably won't be able to see it if you have an iPhone, as it is in Flash. However, if you click on the space under the heading "Photo Album," you will be taken to the actual album that you can click through. Now that this is up and running, I hope to be adding photos to it fast and furious. Please keep checking it and please send me some photos to post - I will get them up as fast as I can. (Darlene, can you please send your email address to beatthisthing@gmail.com, as I have a photo to request of you!).

Happy New Year, and may 2013 bring us all health and happiness!

Christmas in Pelican Bay

 "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

What a wonderful Christmas! Visits with family and friends were enjoyed, two little Christmas miracles filled Mom with joy, the turkey was not ruined and Mom joined the 21st century with a special gift from Santa ... but let's start at the beginning.

Mom finished her radiation treatments on Friday, December 21, 2012. I was able to go into the room with her for her last appointment and see what the experience was like. The technicians at Cancer Care were amazing. What I really appreciated was how they explained to me what was happening. They always referred to her as my Mom, never as "the patient" or anything impersonal. It made me feel good that they recognized this was my Mom, the woman who gave me life, the woman who has protected me and cherished me, the woman who has always put her children before herself, the woman who taught me about all the good in the world. They recognized this was not just another person on the table. This was my Mom. I really appreciated that.

It was hard seeing my Mom alone in that room with the big machine. She was a trooper, though! When she was asked if she wanted to keep the mask she wore to make sure the radiation hit the right spots, she, without hesitation, said yes. She has now decided that she is going to make the mask her wig stand! She seriously never ceases to amaze me.

The mask made the trip back to Pelican Bay with Mom, and unfortunately, so did some headaches. But her anti-swelling medication has been upped again so the headaches seem to have subsided. She is not sleeping as well as she was, and finds that she can't really sleep laying down right now. Hopefully that will change when the swelling from the radiation subsides.

As we knew it would, Mom's hair has started to fall out. But, thanks to Nana, Mom was able to sport a Mrs. Claus hat throughout the holidays, which made her very comfortable with all the company.

As usual, Mom is facing everything with courage and dignity. She is not letting this faze her and says it is all part of getting better. I think many people would be defined by what is happening to their body and the all-consuming effects it has on life, but not Mom. She is not letting cancer define her in any way. She is trying to keep her life as normal as possible while still realizing some of the limitations she faces physically.

Christmas was a great distraction from all the appointments and seriousness of late. On Christmas Eve, Mom held her traditional fete, and the house was packed. It was so great to see everyone! Mom really enjoyed the great company.

On Christmas morning, Mom found out about two little miracles - Kai and Keenan, her twin great-nephews, who were born well before they were due in the waning hours of Christmas Eve. Tears of joy were shed while Mom marvelled at the wonderful news that babies and everyone were doing well.

As "The Big Rip" commenced, Mom was able to watch us all - Sean, Scott, Bri and me - open our presents from her. Not surprisingly, she hit the nail on the head with every one of us. We all received the perfect gifts. Mom received an iPad! We wanted her to have an easy way to check her emails and this blog, as she is getting a lot of strength from all the messages people are sending. We were a little concerned that she would take a while to warm up to the iPad, but we were mistaken! Before we knew it, she had texted a couple people and shot off an email. Her blog is bookmarked, and she is checking comments regularly!

When we were done opening presents, Bri and I started on the turkey, under strict supervision, of course.

Turkey toilers in training

We struggled a bit, I have to admit. Bri gagged as she pulled off some remaining pinfeathers, and I couldn't touch the turkey with my bare hands, so I used Mom's oven mitts.

We didn't realize we'd have to touch it :(

Eventually, we got it ready to go in the oven, and it turned out pretty darn good, if I do say so myself!

Ready to go in the oven!

Looks good enough to eat

A good time was had by all, including Mom's beloved cat Mama, who is taking very good care of Mom and providing lots of purrs and cuddles.

I am fully aware of how cute I look

Mom is pretty tired after all the festivities, but is looking forward to saying farewell to 2012 and kicking butt in 2013. She has an appointment with her medical oncologist on January 3, 2013, to get going on chemo. While she enjoyed the break from treatment these past couple of days, she is also looking forward to keeping the fight going and getting started on chemo.

Please continue to send your wishes through this blog or through email. Your words are giving Mom lots of inspiration.

Happy Holidays!

I Don't Glow in the Dark Yet!

 

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer.”-Albert Camus

 

Thank you all so much for the comments! Your words have had more of an impact than you know. Mom has really enjoyed logging on to check what everyone has to say. Can you believe that she has received closed to 1,000 page views already?! If she didn't know before, she certainly knows now how far-reaching her support base is.

We are starting to get some pictures in. If anyone wants to send pictures, please send them to beatthisthing@gmail.com. I'm posting here a picture that really touched Mom, and I will add it to the photo gallery when that is up and running.

 

 

This little guy is Dylan, and his message: "Stay strong Aunty Laurie" meant the world to Mom. Thank you, Brandi, for sending this!

 

Radiation is now half over, and as Mom says, "I'm not glowing in the dark yet." She may not be glowing, but she is feeling far more fatigued now than she was last week. She has now learned that if she has any errands to run, she has to run them before her appointments, as sleep is the order of the day as soon as she is done! Mom always has a long to-do list, so it is a bit of a shock for her to realize she doesn't have the energy to zip around and get everything done.

 

She is very much looking forward to Christmas and having the chance to see family and friends. Mom has always done Christmas better than anyone I know, and we are all used to her being everywhere and entertaining everyone at this time of the year. And this year, she doesn't plan on changing that very much. However, she is handing over the Christmas dinner reins to me and Bri. Yep, you read that correctly. Bri and I will be cooking the Christmas turkey - under strict supervision, of course. I have never really had a lesson in cooking the turkey because I always figured, "Why mess with perfection?" But, this year, we're going to try it. I am really looking forward to the three of us girls in the kitchen figuring it all out together. I just hope Bri and I can do Mom proud and serve up an edible turkey!

 

We wanted to ask that if anybody has any funny stories, memorable stories or inspirational stories about Mom that they would like to share, please forward them to beatthisthing@gmail.com, and I will add a special "story" post. As a wise friend told me, "At times like this, smiles can go a long way."



 

Comment issue fixed

Sorry for the confusion with posting comments. Now you do not need an ID to post a comment.

Instructions:
1) Simply click on the comment section at the bottom of each post (where it says "No Comments" or a number of comments) 
2) When you are finished your comment, click the drop-down menu and select either "Name" or "Anonymous" (or whatever option you like)
3) Click publish.

We look forward to hearing from you!

The Diagnosis

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength" - Corrie Ten Boom

This isn't going to be easy. I am a writer by trade (and by inclination), but this is going to put all my skills to the test. I don't have a plan for what this blog will look like or what, ultimately, it will say. I know that, whatever my intentions, the emotion is going to creep in here because this blog is about my mom; it's not about cancer.

Future posts will talk more about my mom as a person - her loves, her history, her story. However, I know many of you right now want the facts. You want to know what is happening and how she is doing.

It started with a throat infection, then a cough that just wouldn't go away. Then the diagnosis: Stage 4 lung cancer. The cancer has spread from the lung to lymph nodes in the chest to a lymph node in the neck to some spots on the brain. The good news (and we always grasp onto the good news) is the bone scan is completely clear of any cancer as are the ears, nose and throat. A clean bill of health there!

The doctors have been moving fairly quickly to get treatment started (although Mom was chomping at the bit to get started a while ago). On Wednesday, December 5, 2012, she started radiation treatment at Cancer Care Manitoba. To make sure they don't miss any spots, the doctors have decided to use radiation on the whole brain rather than use a gamma knife to pinpoint the spots. Mom will go every day for the next two weeks to have this treatment. Then, she will meet with the medical oncologist (chemo doctor) to get started on chemotherapy to address the cancer in the other parts of her body.

While all of this is terrifying, there are some positives here. First is that Mom is feeling okay. She is not in any pain. She is not feeling sick. She does get fatigued really fast. She gets breathless, but she is not nauseous or feeling any other symptoms of illness. Although, she is prepared for that to change.

Another positive is the people at Cancer Care Manitoba. The kindness and compassion we have been shown so far is really remarkable. Mom has faith in these people, which is no small feat. It is asking a lot for someone to put their life in your hands, and Mom has done just that with these doctors and nurses.

Another positive - probably the most positive - is Mom's spirit. She is not maudlin or morose. She is not depressed or even angry. Her sole focus is taking care of herself, doing everything the doctors tell her to do and finding wellness again.

When Mom lost her husband and best friend (and my dad), she said something that really resonated with me and taught me a lot about life. She said, "There is a new normal now, and we will have to learn how to live with that." We are now facing another new normal, but Mom is right - as usual - in that cancer is part of our lives now, so we have to adapt. Mom is adapting well. She is tackling everything with strength, dignity and even a little bit of humour. When she discovered hair loss was a side effect of her treatment, she stoically, with a dead-pan voice, said, "You guys better get me a Santa hat!" (which she has already joyfully received from a special angel). As worried as I am, I don't know that I have ever been more proud of my mother.

There are some possible side effects that Mom is facing. She is going to lose her hair due to the radiation treatments. She is going to feel more and more fatigued. There is also a chance of some memory loss or "fogginess." None of these are something she is okay with, but she is facing it with aplomb: In the waiting room before her first radiation treatment, she quickly demolished the Winnipeg Free Press puzzle page, showing me her score and telling me to check it again when she was done her treatment. I don't know if she realizes that not everyone can polish off the puzzle page (a crossword, a soduku, a word scramble, a word puzzle, etc.) in under 20 minutes.

As I said, Mom is very tired, but she is very grateful for the phone messages she has received. She is going to check this blog regularly, so I encourage you to post comments or send emails as often as you like. Also, please feel free to get in touch with myself or Bri-Anne if you'd like more information or just a chat.

We plan on posting a lot of pictures up here because a picture is worth a thousand words, and Mom loves photos. If you have any great photos - inspirational photos, photos of Mom, photos of her family and friends - please send along and I will gladly post them. I hope to get a photo gallery up and running very soon.

Thank you all for being there to help Mom with this fight. She needs each and every one of you. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you.

The First One

The Beginning

It is still so surprising. You always think of cancer as something that happens to someone else. It is a cause you give to every year, and you feel really bad when you hear someone has been diagnosed. You just never think it will be you ... and then it is.

Hearing the doctor say, "You have lung cancer." Then hearing him say, "Mrs. Seel, you are in a very difficult situation," makes your heart stop for a moment. Literally, the "thump thump" in your chest seems to stop and then start again really loud and really fast, so that all you can hear is your heart beating out an incessant rythym in your chest. How do you let something like that sink in? How do you accept that it is your own body that is threatening you? Is there any way to make sense out of all of this?

I know this fight is going to be a tough one, and I know that the many people I love and cherish in my life want to help me. I thought the first thing I could do was set up this blog so that everyone can be updated without me having to tell the same story over and over again. Quite frankly, it is just too difficult. I have also asked my daughter to make regular posts to this blog to keep everyone updated.

A lot of my time lately has been spent thinking, and I came up with a few promises I can make to all of you:

1. I will fight this thing with everything I have and then some. There is no give up in me.
2. I will ask for help if I need it.
3. Sometimes I will want to be alone. If that is the case, I will tell you. However, if I know I shouldn't be alone, if I'm having a really bad day or feeling really down, I will not isolate myself. I will reach out.
4. I will check this blog and my email regularly to read your posts. In fact, that is something I really look forward to.
5. I will keep you all updated through this blog. I love you too much to cut off communication, and I know you are all very worried.

Right now, I am very grateful for the phone messages people have been leaving me. They are so heartfelt, and I appreciate them more than you know. I hope this blog will help us all through the days that are to come.

With that, I will leave it to my daughter. She will fill you in on the nitty-gritty.

With love,
Laurie