"Your body hears everything your mind says" - Naomi Judd
It has been a very anxious few days as we waited to hear the results of Mom's latest scans. With her feeling so weak lately, there was some concern that maybe the news would not be what we so desperately wanted to hear.
As we sat in the hospital room waiting for the doctor, we talked and tried to pretend everything was normal ... but it wasn't. Our lives haven't been normal in quite some time. When the doctor joined us, he started off by apologizing for running a bit behind schedule, saying that there had been some catastrophes he had to deal with. Mom's eyes got really big, and she said, "I hope I'm not one of them!" He smiled at her and said, "No! You are one of our success stories!"
Mom, Bri, and I all let out a collective breath we didn't realize we had been holding. He began to give us the results of the scan: everything was looking good. Some spots in the brain remain, but they are quite small, and there are no new ones. The neck looks clear. The spots in the lungs have gotten smaller. All of this was great news. However, a shadow on Mom's liver showed up on the scans. The doctor was not overly concerned, saying it could be a number of things and that another test will be needed for follow-up. When we inquired further about it, he tried to alleviate our worry and said we really won't know anything further until after the test. He also pointed out that Mom previously had spots on her adrenal gland (that we knew nothing about) that have since disappeared. The body is a marvelous thing!
While this news set us back for a minute, we realized after the meeting that the doctor's focus was on the lungs and on arranging the next step of treatment. We're taking this as a good thing.
Radiation is the most likely next step. Mom has responded really well to chemo, and it seems that the cancer has shrunk to a size that it can be targeted with radiation. However, we won't know the exact plan until our next meeting at the beginning of June.
Mom had more blood taken to see if she needed another transfusion, but her levels were good, so it seems the tiredness is still the effects of the chemo. We're hoping that will subside in the weeks to come.
As an aside, I feel like I have given you the facts in the paragraphs above, but I'd like to take a moment to try and explain to you what the feelings are like. I bet some of you reading this are thinking, "What do you mean you're not worried about a spot on the liver?" I get it. I would have thought that myself a few months ago. Here's the thing. We have to live for small victories right now. When we first got the diagnosis, the doctors were not very positive. Mom has fought like an alley cat and has surprised these experts. The lump in her neck disappeared. Her spots are shrinking. When the doctor says a shadow on a scan could be any number of things that are not cancer-related, we hang on to that. We have to. Mom's victories together have been monumental, but we can't think big picture right now. We think moment-to-moment because that is what is manageable.
The doctor said Mom is a success story. That is what counts. That is what will get us through the next stage of Mom's journey to wellness. She is a success story. She is a warrior. She is tough as nails. I know a lot of you had Mom in your thoughts the last few days and were sending positive energy her way. It was felt! All of us really appreciated the support. We took you all with us into that meeting. Thank you!
Hugs
